I know what you’re thinking… if I really don’t give a damn, why construct this website? Why spend countless hours that, frankly, could’ve been better spent grouting the dried whiz out of my bathroom tile or hunting down octogenarian S&M vids on the internet, to lovingly craft this blog?  Why not just curl into a ball in the metaphorical dark of my sardonic worldview and allow the earth and its (mostly) idiotic citizenry to spin happily on their way to god knows what end, blissfully unaware of my worthless shit-ass opinions?  Why create idontgiveadamn.org in the first place, you self-centered, antisocial weasel rapist?

Well, mainly because idontgiveashit.org was already taken.

OK…let me ask you a super-deep question (and mix a few metaphors at the same time) that may illuminate my position:  If a bear shits in the woods, and there is no one there to smell it,  will that bear still tear you to shreds and eat your liver if you fuck with its cubs?  You’re goddamn right it will.  Then it will go right back to rooting for truffles or eating slugs, or whatever it is bears do after they take a shit in an isolated place.  The moral of the story: never go for a hike if you don’t have a sense of smell, or if your sinuses are congested, or for some reason, you can’t identify the odor of fresh bear droppings.

And clearly, I do give a damn.

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